Blog 4 assignment

Dear Mr. Leoni,

It has been brought to my attention that there seems to be a great deal of discrepancies involving payroll checks within the company. I have taken it upon myself to look quite extensively into these errors in hopes to pinpoint the source of the problem. Moreover, I have examined and reviewed the time sheets, time tickets, and computer files associated with the 37 incorrect payroll checks. Having done that, it seems as if the majority of these miscalculations seem to have taken place as a result of clerical errors (35 out of the 37). Furthermore the computer operators are simply taking the information given to them by the clerks and copying the information as it is presented. I regret to inform you that in reference to our previous conversation, having the computer operators perform the very time-consuming task of comparing their entries against the miscopied time sheets seems to be an unnecessary chore that our company simply cannot afford time wise. It would be greatly appreciated if we may stop this error in advance before it reaches the computer operators. Therefore, I recommend that you tell your clerks to review their work carefully before giving it to the computer operators.

Thank you for understanding,

Donald Pryzblo

Manager, Data Processing Department

I believe the revised version of this email is much more reader friendly. The initial email was very harsh in tone and seemed to be more concerned with pointing fingers instead of addressing the problem at hand and in turn finding a solution. My revision is meant to hold a professional tone, yet still get the message across in a way that addresses the problem at hand as well as deeming the correct solution. It is necessary that Mr. Leoni understand that it is in fact the clerks making the error so that he can no longer place the blame on Pryzblo’s computer operators. However, it is important to keep the email courteous so that Mr. Leoni understands the clerical errors and that he is not resenting Pryzblo for pointing fingers-as the initial email was composed. When talking to fellow co-workers it is always important to uphold the interests of the business as a whole and therefore not refer to employees as “your clerks” or “my computer operators” as did the initial email. By addressing the company as a whole it is more likely that Mr. Leoni will realize Pryzblo’s intentions are not to strictly place blame, but to fix the underlying problem as a whole. That being said, I think it is also important that Pryzblo make it clear to Mr. Leoni of whose fault the error belongs to in order to create less chaos. Had he not done that, the business would be using poor time management skills by wasting time addressing a problem that already had a solution. I believe the revised letter holds true to a professional and courteous tone while still directly addressing the points necessary for the betterment of the business as a whole.

Course Project One

http://rin89.blogspot.com/p/hardship-payments.html
 The attached paper is one that I had written for my previous HR (Human Resources) class that I took last semester. Human Resources is a field that touches base directly with my major of business management simply due to the fact that it deals with the issue of how to manage personnel in a sufficient and ethical manner.  The topic discussed throughout the paper is that of hardship payments and the issues that accompany them.  The audience to which I was directing my paper toward was that of my other classmates, as well as teacher. Hardship payments can be a touchy subject with some seeing as there are a lot of ethical issues associated with the distribution and how a “hardship” is actually defined and carried out. Essentially this can cause a lot of bias in the workforce as well as affect employee morale.  Moreover, the issue can also be tricky to write about because there are many different aspects and perspectives associated with the ethical situations surrounding hardship payments. One may be hesitant to broach topics such as what exactly is right and wrong when it comes to the problematic procedures managers face when deciding the make-up as well as pay structure of hardship payments.

  As with most all papers, there is definite room for improvement on my behalf concerning the context of this particular write up. Although my grade on the paper at hand was sufficient and even somewhat desirable, it was not at a superior level which simply put-should have been achieved.  If I were to perhaps have the chance to alter it in some sense, I would first start by addressing the issue of possibly offering examples and facts as opposed to only my personal opinion. A good write up should be composed of more than the opinion of the author. Having said that, including conclusive facts or even stories would have added to the framework of the paper, and would have also posed as a potential attention grabber for the audience. Another issue I regret not giving more attention to is that of the ethical issues at hand when addressing the subject, as well as worker morale that can sometimes accompany hardship payments. It is indicative to understand the way potential employees react and/or feel about management decisions because the employees themselves necessitate how the business may be operated as a whole.  Although the manager is entitled to the executive decisions in most business settings, it is the actual employees that are responsible for the core of the business.  Therefore, my initial purpose behind writing the paper should not have been to simply discuss the topic of hardship payments in general but instead to also address the idea of the moral issues behind the topic. Perhaps my motive behind doing this was because I was not familiar enough with my fellow classmates and peers to in a sense “push any buttons”. Furthermore, the class was an online class as opposed to a physical classroom setting which makes judging reader reactions clearly more difficult. Even so, I believe that a discussion concerning the ethical and moral aspects should have been addressed nonetheless. Of course, this could have been done in a very educational and professional manner, and yet still have been intriguing to the readers. Having the opportunity to look back on this paper more extensively I now see that had I taken more time to analyze the rhetorical situation and put more time into the write up, I would definitely add the above mentioned objectives and even others.  Additionally, I feel as if specific instances of cultural issues associated with hardship payments needed to be looked into deeper as well.  From a personal standpoint, I believe that when subject matter is out of the norm it typically seems to interest readers more than simply just an opinionated and factual paper. In this case the cultural difference that is out of the norm to us in the U.S. would be that of different cultural working environments in other countries and their perceived notions concerning worker relations. Digging deeper to look into the way others think and feel can only broaden the horizon of the topic and give the reader a better understanding of how the topic may be seen  and related by others.  Conclusively, had I incorporated the above I believe the paper itself would have been much more reader friendly. Looking back it only seems appropriate that I would have included such in the write-up due to the fact that these issues materialize as if they were obvious. However, I had not addressed such at the time and was only concerned on the general topic of hardship payments as opposed to the intricate details associated with such. It is always helpful to take a step back to re-evaluate one’s work in preparation for the future-hopefully I will recognize these issues the next time and be able to address the rhetorical situation in such a manner.

Blog 2

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/05/02/world/02osama-bin-laden-obituary.html?pagewanted=1&_r=1&ref=osamabinladenAs previously mentioned, my major here at Southern is that of business management. Therefore I believe the article “The Most Wanted Face of Terrorism” is a great read which can relate very much so to those of us concerned with the business world, but also to other readers as well. Indeed the topic discussed throughout concerning Bin Laden’s death is undoubtedly a topic discussed by many throughout the world. That being said, I believe the two authors did a great job of honing in on the subject at hand and educating readers of the terrorist leader’s death by distinctly discussing the timeline and events leading up to his death. They gave the article a sense of reality by adding in commentary from past president George Bush as well as quoting Bin Laden himself. The fact that the article was found from the NY Times also adds to its rhetorical situation due to the fact that the violent acts of 9/11, that the terrorist leader ordered, occurred in New York. One can sense the hurt of the American people throughout the article and patriotism is presented in the text as well. Although the authors do not portray their own personal opinions, it is clear to realize that the particulars presented throughout deem the death of Osama Bin Laden’s death as a dire necessity. Personally, I love the idea that these two news reporters teamed up to show America (as well as other readers) the true identity of this man who caused so many people so much hurt-and they did so in a professional, yet direct way. Presenting facts and explanations, as the authors did, is a great way to keep the article clean and yet informatory while sending a strong message to the reader. This is specifically important in the business world. Being a business major, I realize the importance of conveying a message in a way which persuades and relates to readers (or in my case potential customers)-you want to sell your message. Although the two who wrote this article may have done so for strictly educational purposes, it stands to reason that they nonetheless do work for the NY Times which has a goal of reaching consumers by drawing them in through the texts presented. Here again we can see how business is not only presented throughout the article itself, but also throughout the rhetorical situation in which the main goal is to attract more readers, building the reputation of the newspaper and authors themselves. However, it is important to keep in mind the drive the writer has which is also sensed as mentioned earlier. I believe it takes a great deal of both characteristics to write a successful article as these two, that is being able to grab the audience through their writings(developed from inner drive) as well as for the sake of business as a whole and the authors alike.

Week One

Hi fellow ENG 333 students! My name is Erin, and I look forward to obtaining all that this class has to offer. I am currently enrolled in several summer classes at USM in Hattiesburg, and also maintain a part-time job at a local bank in town where I am a Loan Processor/Closer. As far as my previous writing experiences in other classes, I would say that while my writing skill always leaves room for improvement, instructors here at USM have done a great deal in honing the writing skills of its students. Business Management is my major which also entails a great deal of writing and term papers. That being said, I am not a huge fan of writing in general- although it is for the most part not a huge burden which I dread either. Due to the professionalism that surrounds the field in which I major, it is a necessity to have good vocabulary and writing skills. Furthermore, the way a person portrays himself will usually either be a deal sealer or a deal breaker, so to speak. Therefore, I hope that throughout this course I can gain a better grasp of the acceptable means of verbiage and writing skills needed to help me succeed now as well as later down the road.